


Mystery Left

by portions_forfox



Category: Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-28
Updated: 2012-06-28
Packaged: 2017-11-08 17:59:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/445924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/portions_forfox/pseuds/portions_forfox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chloe isn't gay, she just wants to touch June's boobs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mystery Left

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dollsome](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dollsome/gifts).



> Written for dollsome, at her own [femslash comment ficathon](http://dollsome.livejournal.com/1794393), who prompted _June/Chloe, And I think I'm kinda gay._

There are rules that must be established. Like, boundaries. Clarifications.  
  
For example, "Just because I left my toothbrush out on the bathroom counter does not mean I'm inviting you to use it as a sex toy."  
  
Or, "Please do not delete my DVR recordings of Say Yes to the Dress just beceause The Devil Wears Nada is on the HBO porn channel again."  
  
Or even, "If you're going to have sex in my bedroom, at least leave your room unlocked so I can cry in there."  
  
But lately the recurring clarification has been an exchange somewhere along the lines of:  
  
"Hey Chloe, what do you think of this incredibly tight, low-plunging new black dress?"  
  
"I think I'm kinda gay."  
  
(A sigh, and) "No, Chloe, you're not gay, you just want to touch my boobs."  
  
(Here Chloe puts on her pleading puppy dog face, which works on everyone but, like, so totally doesn't do it for June. Like,  _totally_  not even a little bit.) "They just look so sah-ha-haft!" Chloe whines, and June rolls her eyes and tells Chloe to touch her own boobs.  
  
"They're not as big," she laments as June stalks past her into the kitchen. (She's wearing Chloe's King Kong heels, so the walk's not as, like, sassy as she'd hoped. More on the wobbly side.) "Or as blonde."  
  
"Boobs can't be blonde," June reminds her.  
  
"They so  _totally_  can," Chloe insists, stalking past June in heels twice as tall. It's like a competitive catwalk to the refridgerator. (Wait, why are they even doing this. Why is this a question June finds herself asking in an endless loop nowadays.) "Blondes always have better boobs."  
  
June huffs out a breath. "While I appreciate the compliment, we really can't have you groping me or identifying as gay just because you've taken such a liking to my bosom."  
  
"First off, never say bosom again," Chloe orders matter-of-factly. June's just now made it into the kitchen, and Chloe's already seated plaintively at the table with a cup of pudding. (How does she  _do_  that?) "It makes you sound like an aging Christian prostitute."  
  
"Is that even a—"  
  
"Secondly, I wouldn't be  _groping_  you. That makes it sound like I don't know what I'm doing."  
  
"You  _don't_ , Chloe, because you're not  _gay_ ," June sighs, resisting a foot-stamp at the fact that there's no pudding left. Mostly because she's pretty sure she'd topple over in these heels. (God, why is she even wearing these? She's not even  _going_  anywhere, this doesn't make sense.)  
  
"But I'm me, so I would rock your world," Chloe informs her, flicking her spoon and making a  _duh_  face. "Not that it would be very hard, considering you don't have many points of comparison."  
  
"Hey!" Chloe half-heartedly defends, mouth full of Jell-O. It's the green kind. It isn't that good.  
  
"And thirdly, I didn't say I was gay," Chloe reprimands with a roll of her eyes as June slides into the seat across from her. "I said I was  _kinda_  gay. Like, just gay for you."  
  
June sets down her spoon and swallows her Jell-O. Maybe it's just that this dress is causing a lack of oxygen to her brain but she is, like, genuinely touched.  
  
"You're gay," she whispers earnestly, "just for me?"  
  
Chloe sets down her spoon as well—an act of the deepest reverence—and stares straight into June's disproportionately large eyes.  
  
"June," she replies gravely, "I would go so gay for you, women's prisons would be renamed Straightville."  
  
June claps a hand over her heart. "Aw," she purrs, "I have no idea what that means, and yet there are tears welling up in my eyes."  
  
"I'm glad," Chloe hums, patting June's hand. "So can I touch your boobs now?"  
  
"Grope away!"  
  
Chloe lunges across the table with, "I told you, it's not groping."  
  
June's distracted anyway. "Oh my god, do you have magic hands? Good  _lord_!"  
  
"I said I would rock your near-virginal world, didn't I?"  
  
"Yeah, but this is beyond rocking, this is like—like— _blowing_  my world—"  
  
"No blowing to _night_ , girlfriend."  
  
"Yeah, so like, my bedroom?"  
  
"Yay, the one time I can have sex in there and you won't cry about it!"  
  
"Wait, how many times have you—"  
  
"Sshh, magic hands, remember?"

 


End file.
